Lindsay Lohan may have a new boyfriend.
Yes, that matters. It should matter to all Americans.
The 26-year-old actress is involved with a 22-year-old New York DJ by the name of Julian Cavin, reports the New York Daily News.
"'Dating' may be too heavy of a word to use right now," said a source, who supposedly saw the pair "sucking face in front of everyone."
This "sucking face" business supposedly happened Friday night, the source told the Daily News. "They haven't been hooking up that long." According to another source, the two "spent all weekend together and they're seeing each other."
But, because this is a Lindsay Lohan story, know that according to the Daily News, when Lohan visited her new guy at Goldbar, the club where he works, "she was a mess. She started dirty dancing (on Cavin) when he wasn't in the (DJ) booth."
Are we sure she's not simply auditioning for "Dirty Dancing II: The STDs Strike Back?"
An eyewitness told the Daily News that when one of Cavin's friends made an innocent comment about the two being "a cute couple," Lohan went cuckoo and tried to get her kicked out of the club. "Lindsay grabbed every bouncer and bottle girl she could find and goes 'Get this girl the (expletive) out of here.'"
Predictably, they didn't ... and checked their pockets to make sure their valuables were still intact.
SEAL WHO KILLED BIN LADEN LIKES
Chastain is nominated for an Oscar for Best Actress in a Leading Role for playing CIA Agent "Maya," based on a real woman whose identity remains hidden.
In a new interview with Esquire magazine, the anonymous Navy SEAL (referred to as "the Shooter" throughout the article) talks about how killing bin Laden in May 2011 changed his and his family's lives and about the film based on the raid in Pakistan.
The Shooter said Chastain's portrayal was "awesome. They made her a tough woman, which she is," he said, according to Us Weekly.
He also talked about the film's inaccuracies. He said there was too much talking between SEAL team members -- silence is the standard practice -- and they would never yell "breacher" during an assault.
"It was fun to watch. There was just little stuff," he said. "The helos (helicopters) turned the wrong way (toward the target), and they talked way, way too much (during the assault on bin Laden's compound). If someone was waiting for you, they could track your movements that way."
While watching the film, he said "They torture the (expletive) out of people in this movie, don't they? Everyone is chained to something."
He does not make clear whether he believes the movie was accurate in this regard.
The Shooter said tactics "sucked" in the film and "the mission in the damn movie took way too long" compared to real events. "When Osama went down, it was chaos, people screaming. No one called his name. They Hollywooded it up some."
According to Us, the Shooter said he brought the real-life "Maya" over to bin Laden's body and she cried. "That's when I took my magazine out of my gun and gave it to her as a souvenir," he said. "Twenty-seven bullets left in it. That was the last time I saw her."
CHRIS BROWN BLAMES PAPARAZZI FOR CRASH: Chris Brown crashed his car Sunday, and claimed the accident was the result of the paparazzi chasing him, according to TMZ.
Brown's rep released a statement Sunday saying Brown was cut off by two photographers and blamed the accident on "aggressive pursuit by the paparazzi."
Not true, say the photographers.
Chris Doherty, owner of INF, the photo agency employing the photographers who ended up on the scene, told TMZ his workers "had nothing to do with Chris Brown crashing." He said they showed up after Brown wrecked his car. "No photographers were following him at the time he crashed. He crashed his car and it's convenient for him to blame us. He needs to be careful with his defamatory statements."
That sounded vaguely threatening. Good thing for Doherty that Brown isn't the violent type.
Doherty said police interviewed his employees at the scene and "appeared to be satisfied" the paparazzi was not the cause of the accident.
Beverly Hills Police released a statement saying, "On February 9, 2013 at approximately 12:03 p.m. entertainer Chris Brown was involved in a solo, non-injury traffic collision in the 600 Block Bedford Drive/Camden Drive alley. Mr. Brown was the driver of the vehicle and collided with a wall. Brown stated that he was being chased by paparazzi causing him to lose control of his vehicle. Brown's Black Porsche was towed from the scene at his request."
A rep for Brown said the singer, who attended the Grammys with Rihanna on Sunday, is considering a lawsuit over the crash.
JUSTIN BIEBER APOLOGIZES FOR SMOKING POT: Justin Bieber apologized for smoking pot -- sort of -- while hosting Saturday Night Live last weekend.
While in character as the president of the Miley Cyrus Fan Club on "The Miley Cyrus Show" sketch, he scolded Cyrus (played by Vanessa Bayer) for being friends with "that douche Justin Bieber."
"You're kidding me right. He looks like a lesbian ... . I heard he still has his baby teeth," he said. "I also heard he got busted for smoking weed and he's really sorry about it and people make mistakes and he's never gonna do it again."
Of course he won't.
Following his January breakup with Selena Gomez, photos of Bieber smoking marijuana at a party emerged on the Internet. More recent reports put him at a another party smoking pot and drinking "sizzurp" -- a combination of promethazine/codeine cough syrup and soda.
OMG, you guys. Maybe he was just, like, sick or something.
FEBRUARY 12 IN HISTORY
Tuesday is Feb. 12, the 43rd day of 2013. There are 322 days left in the year.
1554: Lady Jane Grey, who'd claimed the throne of England for nine days, and her husband, Guildford Dudley, were beheaded after being condemned for high treason.
1809: Abraham Lincoln, the 16th president of the United States, was born in present-day Larue County, Ky.
1818: Chile officially proclaimed its independence, more than seven years after initially renouncing Spanish rule.
1909: The National Association for the Advancement of Colored People was founded.
1912: Pu Yi, the last emperor of China, abdicated, marking the end of the Qing Dynasty.
1915: The cornerstone for the Lincoln Memorial was laid in Washington D.C., a year to the day after groundbreaking.
1924: George Gershwin's "Rhapsody in Blue" premiered in New York.
1940: The radio play "The Adventures of Superman" debuted with Bud Collyer as the Man of Steel.
1959: The redesigned Lincoln penny -- with an image of the Lincoln Memorial replacing two ears of wheat on the reverse side -- went into circulation.
1963: President John F. Kennedy celebrated the 100th anniversary of the Emancipation Proclamation with a reception at the White House. A Northwest Orient Airlines Boeing 720 broke up during severe turbulence and crashed into the Florida Everglades, killing all 43 people aboard.
1973: Operation Homecoming began as the first release of American prisoners of war from the Vietnam conflict took place.
1993: In a crime that shocked and outraged Britons, two 10-year-old boys, Robert Thompson and Jon Venables, lured 2-year-old James Bulger from his mother at a shopping mall near Liverpool, England, then beat him to death. (Thompson and Venables were kept in custody before being paroled in 2001 at age 18; Venables was jailed in 2010 for possessing and distributing child pornography.)
1999: The Senate voted to acquit President Bill Clinton of perjury and obstruction of justice.
2003: The U.N. nuclear agency declared North Korea in violation of international treaties, sending the dispute to the Security Council. India conducted its fourth missile test of 2003, firing a supersonic cruise missile.
2008: General Motors reported losing $38.7 billion in 2007, a record annual loss in automotive history, and offered buyouts to 74,000 hourly workers.
2012: One year ago: Adele emerged as the top winner at the Grammy Awards, winning six trophies, including record, song and album of the year, in a ceremony shadowed by the death of Whitney Houston the day before.
Baseball Hall-of-Fame sportscaster Joe Garagiola (87), basketball Hall-of-Famer Bill Russell (79), actor Joe Don Baker (77), author Judy Blume (75), rock musician Ray Manzarek (The Doors) (74), rock singer Michael McDonald (61), former talk show host Arsenio Hall (58), actor Josh Brolin (45), singer Chynna Phillips (45), actress Christina Ricci (33), NFL quarterback Robert Griffin III (23).