Robert DeNiro had a bone to pick with Jay-Z.
As his fans know, Jay-Z is a big DeNiro fan. He frequently name-drops the iconic actor, from the opening lines of "New York State of Mind" ("Yeah, I'm out that Brooklyn, now I'm down in TriBeCa, right next to De Niro") to "Party Life" ("Sippin' on my vino got me cooler than Pacino and De Niro put together, my real life is like 'Casino'").
But the hip-hop icon got on DeNiro's bad side by not practicing proper phone etiquette, according to the New York Post, which reported the two were in a "tense beef" at Leonardo DiCaprio's stuffed charitable birthday bash last weekend.
I hate tense beef.
De Niro reportedly took Jay-Z to task for not returning his calls over plans to record a song for the TriBeCa Film Festival.
"Bob was sitting at a table, and when Jay-Z went over to say hello, De Niro told Jay that he never called him back," said a witness. "Bob wasn't in any mood to make polite conversation. He told Jay that if somebody calls you six times, you call them back. It doesn't matter who you are, that is just rude."
That's right. How about a little bit of courtesy, huh? Just a little bit.
Jay-Z laughed and sheepishly explained he's "terrible on the phone," according to a source.
So DeNiro pistol-whipped him.
No he didn't.
"De Niro kept telling him that he thinks he's the man," recalls the snitch, "but that he was disrespectful.'"
Can you imagine Robert DeNiro telling you you're being "disrespectful?" Either you want to run away, or it's the greatest moment of your life.
Perhaps sensing her husband was in trouble, Beyonce came over, but DeNiro wasn't deterred.
"It was the talk of the party," said the source. "Everyone was saying there's only one star in New York bigger and badder than Jay-Z, and that's Robert De Niro. He can be quite scary when he's angry."
Maybe ... a little bit.
Another insider insists the whole thing was no big deal.
"It was a low-key private conversation between two people that was apparently overheard," a De Niro confidant told the paper. "It was not a heated discussion."
Not even a little bit?
LINDSAY LOAN HAS A NEW SISTER: Lindsay Lohan just found out she has another sister.
Her father, Michael Lohan, fathered an illegitimate child in 1995 while married to Dina Lohan. This was just confirmed by a DNA test, and, the revelation is on tape, of course.
Lohan agreed to submit to a DNA test for an episode of "Trisha Goddard," during which he comes face-to-face for the first time with the 17-year-old girl claiming to be his daughter.
Yep -- she is.
Nope -- this isn't very surprising.
The girl's mother, Kristi Horn, has been claiming for years that Michael Lohan is the father of her daughter. She has tried multiple times to get him to pay child support, while he adamantly denied the allegations, according to TMZ.
The scene on "Trisha Goddard" is apparently pretty cringe worthy. Which makes sense, if it contains Michael Lohan.
Michael Lohan supposedly can't believe the news, while Horn bursts into tears.
Then Lohan tries to hug his newfound daughter, who's named Ashley. The girl reacts by shouting, "No! No! No!" while Lohan pleads, "I just want to hug you."
Suddenly I want to take a shower.
Lohan's two youngest children with Dina -- Ali and Cody -- were born in 1993 and 1996 respectively. Which means Ashley was conceived somewhere in the middle.
Lindsay Lohan hasn't responded publicly yet.
SELENA GOMEZ WON'T TALK TO JUSTIN BIEBER: Selena Gomez doesn't seem pleased with Justin Bieber.
Gomez has apparently blocked her phone numbers and other communication devices so Bieber cannot contact her, TMZ reported.
If it makes you feel better, Selena, when I heard you broke up, I blocked him too.
Sources familiar with the situation said Gomez wants no contact with Bieber, so whatever they tried hashing out during their sit-down last Sunday didn't work. She has blocked her phone (which includes texting). For some reason, she's still following Bieber, but on all forms of communication, he's out.
TMZ also reported that the break-up did indeed involve another women, though they don't know which one. There's been speculation that it's a Victoria's Secret model.
It must be tough to be Justin Bieber.
JON BON JOVI'S DAUGHTER OF THE HOOK: Jon Bon Jovi's daughter will not face prosecution after allegedly overdosing on heroin in a college dorm Wednesday.
The Oneida County District Attorney's Office told TMZ no charges will be filed against 19-year-old Stephanie Bongiovi, or against the 21-year-old male student allegedly involved with her overdose. Bongiovi was arrested after being treated by emergency medical personnel following the alleged overdose at a Hamilton College dormitory. Police said they found small quantities of heroin in the dorm room, along with marijuana and drug paraphernalia.
Bongiovi was arrested for suspicion of possession of a controlled substance, possession of marijuana and criminally using drug paraphernalia. The 21-year-old was also arrested for suspected drug possession.
The D.A. said charges were dropped because of a New York law that prohibits prosecuting people experiencing a drug overdose, as well as the people who help them seek medical care.
MARY POPPINS AUTHOR NO FAN OF THE FILM: The author of Mary Poppins hated Julie Andrews and Dick Van Dyke in the movie.
Van Dyke told TMZ on Wednesday he's excited about Tom Hanks playing Walt Disney in an upcoming movie about the making of "Mary Poppins."
He also said there was some serious drama behind the scenes, with author P.L. Travers battling Disney for years before begrudgingly allowing him to make the film.
"She didn't want to do it," Van Dyke said. "She just hated the idea. She hated Julie (Andrews) and she hated me."
Who hates Dick Van Dyke?
Travers apparently hated the movie so much, she put it in her will that no Americans shall ever be granted permission to work on a Poppins project ever again.
She was probably just mad because over that whole American revolution thing.
NOVEMBER 16 IN HISTORY
Friday is Nov. 16, the 321st day of 2012. There are 45 days left in the year.
1776: British troops captured Fort Washington in New York during the American Revolution.
1885: Canadian rebel leader Louis Riel was executed for high treason.
1907: Oklahoma became the 46th state of the union.
1917: Georges Clemenceau again became prime minister of France.
1933: The United States and the Soviet Union established diplomatic relations.
1946: The United Nations Educational, Scientific and Cultural Organization (UNESCO) was founded at the conclusion of a conference in London.
1959: The Rodgers and Hammerstein musical "The Sound of Music" opened on Broadway.
1960: Academy Award-winning actor Clark Gable died in Los Angeles at age 59.
1961: House Speaker Samuel T. Rayburn, 79, died at his home in Bonham, Texas, having served as speaker since 1940 except for two terms as minority leader of the Democrats.
1973: Skylab 4, carrying a crew of three astronauts, was launched from Cape Canaveral on an 84-day mission.
1982: An agreement was announced in the 57th day of a strike by National Football League players.
1997: China's most prominent pro-democracy campaigner, Wei Jingsheng, arrived in the United States after being released following nearly 18 years of imprisonment in his country.
2002: In an open letter to the Iraqi Parliament, President Saddam Hussein said he had no choice but to accept a tough, new U.N. weapons inspection resolution because the United States and Israel had shown their "claws and teeth" and declared unilateral war on the Iraqi people.
2007: Senate Republicans blocked a $50 billion bill by Democrats that would have paid for several months of combat but also would have ordered troop withdrawals from Iraq to begin within 30 days. Marchers surrounded the Justice Department headquarters to demand federal intervention in the Jena Six case in Louisiana and stepped-up enforcement of hate crimes. Poland's new prime minister, Donald Tusk, formally took office along with a team of former anti-communist dissidents.
Actor David Leisure (62), former MLB All-Star pitcher Dwight Gooden (48), jazz singer Diana Krall (48), rock musician Dave Kushner (Velvet Revolver) (46), actress Lisa Bonet (45), singer Bryan Abrams (Color Me Badd) (43), actress Martha Plimpton (42), Olympic gold medal figure skater Oksana Baiul (35), actress Maggie Gyllenhaal (35), NBA player Amare Stoudemire (30), actor Noah Gray-Cabey ("Heroes") (17).